Well, we all figured Disney would make another musical but HSM…4? News broke today that there will be indeed another sequel to the popular franchise made.  Hmm, I don’t quite get it.  Wasn’t the tagline for the third “Senior Year?” Hmm, something smells fishy.
THEPOPFIX.com did some digging and, sure enough, it appears that Troy Bolton [...]

Well, the public has spoken and they shout a resounding “no” to the Jonas Brothers, even in 3 dimensions. “Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience” took in just 12.7 million this past weekend, less than half of what analysts had predicted. The brothers represent some of the most radical and bigoted of all religious nut jobs here in America, better known as Evangelical Christians. Complete with a bible thumping preacher of a father and proudly donning sex-banning “promise rings,” the Jonas Brothers are more or less the reason Muslim extremists hate our country. Whoops, did I just say that?

What, you may ask, is illustrious director, actor and altogether Hollywood badass Ron Howard up to these days? A rap video, of course! In a highly strange and, well, altogether amazing turn of events, Jamie Foxx’s new music video for the song “Blame It” features a cast of cameos that would make “Tropic Thunder” jealous. No, no Tom Cruise here, he’s too busy being a pompous asshole. But we do have cameos by, and you may need brace yourself here; Jake Gyllenhaal, Samuel L. Jackson, Forest Whitaker and the aforementioned Ron Howard supplementing Foxx’s ghetto-fab ode to everyone’s favorite drug, alcohol! It is unnerving at first to see Howard in such a strange setting but, come on, Richie Cunningham lived a pretty thug life himself back in the day.

Recession? What recession? Box office profits have proven to be virtually invincible to the recent economic downfall with revenue in 2009 commanding a whopping 23.2% increase over this time last year. Meanwhile, with an increasingly agitated unemployed workforce, dollar menus at popular fast food venues, such as McDonalds, are reaping the benefits of a broke populous. McDonalds reported a sales jump of nearly eight percent due to the affordable options presented on its “Dollar Menu” such as the McChicken Sandwich.

It is with extremely passionate excitement that I can utter the following phrase without failing a lie detector test. THE ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT MOVIE IS ON (period). While there have been talks of such a film for the past, oh 3 or so years, Michael Cera has overcome his awkward ego and decided to reprise the role of George Michael Bluth. The entire original cast, which featured the likes of Jason Bateman, Will Arnett and David Cross, among others, is also set to return. Ron Howard, who narrated the 53 episode long series, has been rumored to direct while series creator Michael Hurwitz will pen the screenplay.

Move over Paul Blart, your reign as Hollywood’s predominant oversized hero has come to an end. Tyler Perry’s “Madea Goes To Jail” has officially become the number one film in America courtesy of, you guessed it, the large and in charge antics of pot-smoking, gun-wielding Mabel “Madea” Simmons. The Lionsgate release pulled in 41.1 million last weekend, a record setting numbers for the company. 2009 has proved to be the year of the obese hero. Pleasantly plump children all across America finally have a reason to go to school outside of lunch break. Heroes like Madea and Paul Blart have the power to inspire confidence that even they can solve crimes, break out of jail and yes, even ride on Segways. ‘Bout damn time.

High five Hollywood, we did it! In a record year for minorities, foreigners and homosexuals, the Oscars churned out gold statues with fervor. Danny Boyle, director of the Indian film “Slumdog Millionaire” sat entranced by the ceremony with a smile that could only be compared to an eight-year-old boy who just found a Ken Griffey Jr. MVP baseball card as his film won award after award, totaling a magical eight.

The spectacle was grand and the performances were lavish. Who can argue with Hugh Jackman dancing and singing with the likes of one and only Zac Efron? Efron, whose slick-backed comb over looked more 2002 coke head stock broker than tween icon, could only be described as highly confusing…”What am I doing here, did HSM:3 get some nominations?”