It’s aggressive.

The internet is inundated, drowning in self-help articles and they’re starting to sound a lot like the covers of magazines like Self or Cosmo. Don’t get us wrong, we’re all for self-improvement, but it’s getting to the point where the self-industry is just over-played, cheesy, and driving us crazy. We need a pause from self-help, and that’s why Kristin Mineo’s on her SOAPBOX sharing about why she’s so over self-help.

The Tim Burton classic turns 26 this week and the ghost with the most has appeared in the news a lot over the last six months as original cast and crew have been discussing the possibility of returning for a sequel.

It started back in October when our friends the Schmoes reported that Tim Burton was in talks to direct a follow up. Actress Winona Rider added fuel to the fire the following month when she said that despite being “sworn to secrecy” it looked like the sequel “might be happening” going on to say that the film that was being discussed was “not a remake.” Recently on a press tour for “Robocop,” Michael Keaton himself confirmed that the role was one that he was always interested in returning to but only if Burton was involved. According to Keaton, it looks like he is.

Got the facts? Great. Now let Clarke Wolfe tell you why THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA on this week’s SOAPBOX!

One Direction? Who are these guys, and more importantly, where is their stylist?

Regardless of how adorable this imported, singing gang of jail-bait may be – when the latest boyband du jour starts rocking the bedhead look, it’s enough to make me want to throw my hands up and resort to terrible puns.

This hair ‘do is now a hair don’t.

Could One Direction push this style (of lack thereof) that’s normally reserved for the homeless, the comb-less, and indie band members out of hipster obscurity and into worldwide popularity? Is Harry Styles that impossibly cool? Is bedhead making a comeback? If it is, it’s certainly not getting a comb-back.

Too soon?

What say you, my friends, you be the judge – leave a comment below and let me know what you think.

But first, let’s take a look back at the Rock n’ Roll Haircut Hall Of Fame.

You know, strictly for research purposes. Or pure comedy.

Until next time,

what’s your fix?

The girls in a cluster, like little predators hunting for their prey. If the man is moving, drinking alcohol, warm-blooded and is somewhat good-looking, game over for that dude. Kristin Mineo explains on this week’s Soapbox!

If that is indeed the case, you are probably familiar with Kanye West, or as I like to call him, “The gift that keeps on giving.” I’m actually a big fan of Kanye. When I first moved to LA, “808’s and Heartbreak” was my JAM album. I sang back up on “Gold Digger” karaoke just last week. But Houston, we have a problem.

BOUND 2. The music video that premiered on “Ellen” (I’m sorry, what?) back in November. What is this? This is a big old mess, that’s what this is! And it needs to stop. Now.

Motorcycles that are CLEARLY not moving and are set up in front of a wind machine; topless Kim Kardashian AGAIN and a song that isn’t even a song! It’s just talking with random sounds playing behind him.

Yeezy! I know modesty has never been your strong suit but this video is insane and not in a good way. And since you’ve decided to breed into a family that has quite literally no boundaries — we’ve seen them have sex, get married, have a baby, put out their first legal 18 nipple photos — they’re certainly not going to keep you in check.

Hova, this is on YOU! Kanye is becoming M. Night Shyamalan of hip hop. You’re going to need to step in, STAT! He’s “Lady In The Water”-ing all over himself!

And speaking of super famous people simulating sex for cheap publicity but calling it art can we talk about the “Nymphomaniac” trailer for a second?

Nymphomaniac Official Trailer from Zentropa on Vimeo.

Lars von Trier, you show boating doofus, I’m calling you out. This trailer is ridiculous. It looks like the R-rated version of “Les Cousins Dangereux.”

I made it one minute and seventeen seconds into the “Nymphomaniac” trailer without laughing, which is quite the accomplishment, considering. Aside from allegely graphic sex — which was reshot with actual porn stars and CG’d in — all I get from this trailer is Uma Thurman screaming, Willem Dafoe answering a door creepily (so, being Willem Dafoe) and Shia LaBeouf with a British accent.

Oh, and did you know it’s a Lars von Trier film? Did you miss that from the 800 times his name flashed across the screen in a 90 second trailer?

Shameless self promotion, saying things just to cause a controversy, filming real sex and then releasing it as a movie — hey wait, are we sure Lars von Trier isn’t a Kardashian?

Ladies and gentlemen! I get it! Sex sells! I’m no prude but for the love of god, put it away! Or at least do something good with it because both “Bound 2″ and “Nymphomaniac” look like they took a day to shoot and were filmed on someones web cam NOT in a good way!

Ah. What do I know?

Maybe I just need to get laid….

How soon is too soon when it comes to listening to Christmas music?

In this episode of SOAPBOX, Erin Darling shares her thoughts on why Christmas cheer – spread by the glory of fa-la-la-la-la’s and caroling – shouldn’t be limited to the month of December.

What say you? Are you a Christmas music naysayer, or yeasayer? Join the conversation, and leave a comment below!

I am also a twenty-something year-old young lady so Halloween often comes with an expectation that I know you all are familiar with…

Slutty Halloween costumes.

We’ve seen slutty Sesame Street characters, and slutty Ninja Turtles in the past, but this year brought things to a new level of insanity with the introduction of a slutty Rick Grimes Walking Dead costume as well as a sexy pizza slice costume.

A sexy pizza slice? What. Is. Happening?

And, you know what, this isn’t some Miley Cyrus slut shaming SOAPBOX — if you want to dress up as a sexy watermelon (also a costume), you be my guest, but now we’ve crossed into a place where there is an expectation that because I’m a gal in my twenties, whatever my costume is going to be, is going to be the sexy version of said costume.

This year I was determined to finally live out my childhood fantasy of getting to be Marty McFly. And when I revealed this information to friends who asked what I was going to be for Halloween, the follow up question was always, “Oh, so like, sexy Marty McFly?”

No! Not sexy Marty McFly. Just regular Marty McFly. What the heck you guys?

This sexy Halloween costume topic also leads me to an embarrassing party conversation when one time a girl walked into a party with short teased out hair, lots of make up, a black bustier, and no pants. Just some weird leather underwear thing. Me, being the glass is half full Halloween enthusiast that I am, I asked the girl if she was Frank-N-Furter from “Rocky Horror Picture Show” because that’s what she was dressed as.

But nay, she was not Frank-N-Furter. She informed me that she was, in fact, a sexy Cruella De Vil…

No puppies. No coat. No qualifying accessory that would lead any rational human being to draw that conclusion.

So to all the sexy tacos and future sexy Daryl Dixon’s out there, live your life, do what you do, mazel tov, but stop ruining Halloween for the rest of us!

… The Marty McFly turned out pretty well though, right? I like that one.

Clarke Wolfe as Marty McFly, Halloween 2013.